Good news – we’re bringing “brainless” back. “Brainless” is an old expression that somehow fell out of common use about two or three decades ago. That’s sad because “brainless” is a direct, succinct way to accurately describe any number of unintelligent, silly, or foolish people and/or their actions without having to elaborate or to rely on profanity. No other explanation is necessary. That one simple word – “brainless” – says it all.
This word could be used to describe your boss (unless you’re self-employed), your bosses boss, your co-workers, some of your relatives, most if not all of your in-laws, your friends, your spouse’s friends, the guy tailgating you, the coach of your child’s sports team, the coach or manager of your favorite professional sports team, referees and umpires, politicians, and anyone employed in a bureaucratic position. Think of the possibilities. “Hey brainless, what are you doing?” “Hey brainless, what were you thinking?” “Hey brainless, where do you think you’re going?” “Hey brainless, what game are you watching?”
As you can see, brainless is typically preceded with the ubiquitous “Hey” and proceeded with a comma and a rhetorical question. There are other variations of this such as, “Did you see Brainless walk into the ladies room?” “I went to lunch with Brainless today.” “We had to go to my wife’s cousin’s house because it was their brainless son’s birthday.” And so forth and so on.
I think if we all made a reasonable effort to include “brainless” in our everyday language, we can not only reduce the amount of profanity so commonly used today, but bring back an old standby and faithful friend.
Take care and I’ll talk to you soon.
Robert
P.S. – Other excellent terms that I hope will start making inroads into common usage
- “See you later, Sweet Potato”; compliments of my father.
- “See you in a while, Honey
- “Okey Dokey, Smokey”; compliments of Connor Fleming III.
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